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Vol 60: Issue 39

Eric Adams Indicted On Federal Corruption Charges

New York City Mayor Eric Adams has been indicted on five federal charges related to bribery, wire fraud, conspiracy, and soliciting campaign contributions from foreign nationals, with the unsealed indictment alleging illegal actions…

Botox: Myth Vs. Fact

The wrinkle-reducing treatment Botox is the most popular nonsurgical cosmetic procedure in the world. The Onion debunks some of the most common myths surrounding the injectable. MYTH: Botox makes patients’ faces look frozen. FACT: The…

Nude Photos Of Cancer Patients Leaked

A Pennsylvania health care system agreed to pay $65 million to victims of a ransomware attack after hackers posted nude photos of cancer patients online, the largest settlement of its kind in terms of per-patient compensation for victims of…

Panicked Eric Adams Takes City Hall Employees Hostage

NEW YORK—Erratically waving a pistol as he declared himself a mayor with nothing left to lose, a panicked Eric Adams took multiple hostages Thursday at New York City Hall, according to reports from inside the building. “I don’t want to hurt…

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