Vol 61: Issue 20

Gov. Ron DeSantis (R-FL) signed a bill banning “the use of certain additives” in public water systems, making Florida the second state, after Utah, to ban fluoride from drinking water. What do you think? “Teeth are mostly vestigial…

Grocery Store’s Meat Section Misted With Fresh Blood Every Few Minutes - The Onion Published: May 16, 2025 Advertising Advertising Explore More…

CHICAGO—Insisting that a demonstration of the form was necessary to display its full force and power, elderly salsa instructor Hector Moreno announced his plan during a Thursday evening introductory class to dance with your…

NDIANAPOLIS—In an effort to curb unauthorized traffic to adult websites within the state, Indiana lawmakers passed new legislation Thursday requiring all potential viewers of online pornography to register as sex offenders before they could…

Any Deport In A Storm - The Onion Published: May 16, 2025 Advertising Advertising Explore More Cartoons The Onion

A Wisconsin man has voluntarily been bitten by snakes hundreds of times, with scientists now studying his blood in hopes of creating better treatments for snake bites. What do you think? “I get it. Quitting snake bites is one of the…

WASHINGTON—Sitting in the front row and snapping his fingers in time to the 1980 musical’s overture, President Donald Trump rehearsed his Cabinet for a Kennedy Center performance of Les Misérables amid an escalating boycott by the show’s…

NEW YORK—After months of closing in on the former news anchor’s legendary record, Michael Strahan surpassed Diane Sawyer on Friday as Good Morning America‘s all-time sack leader. “Throughout his career on GMA, Strahan has led the…

Supporters of Robert F. Kennedy Jr. are cheering on the Health And Human Services secretary’s plans to “Make America Healthy Again.” Here is everything you need to know about the MAHA movement. Q: What is MAHA? A: It’s like MAGA but with…

Studies have shown that creating a neat and organized living space can reduce stress and improve mental well-being. The Onion provides helpful guidance for decluttering your home. Lure Marie Kondo into your home using an evenly spaced trail…