Worldviews

U.S.—As the gas shortages continue following the Colonial Pipeline hack, Antifa members have been forced to find alternatives to throwing Molotov cocktails. Now the well-known, mostly peaceful freedom fighters have resorted to…

NEW YORK, NY—Now that lots of places are removing their mask mandates, many liberals are running into a problem: people are mistaking them for freedom-loving Republicans. Some say they are going to continue to triple-mask well after…

Columbus Day Reinstated After Experts Learn Indigenous Peoples He Conquered Only Believed In Two Genders NEW YORK, NY—Just as suddenly as the New York City school board announced they would celebrate Indigenous Peoples’ Day instead of…

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Standing on the shoulders of all the brave souls through the centuries who fought for equality, American liberals have finally smashed that glass ceiling in with a curling iron. At long last, the term woman (probably a Don…

LANGLEY, VA—The Central Intelligence Agency has already seen results of its new intersectional hiring campaign. The Agency’s recent recruits have announced they’ve broken up an ISIS plot to refer to people by incorrect pronouns. “That’s…

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In the wake of a black man from the South expressing optimism about race in America, outraged liberals across the nation are doing everything in their power to crush that kind of positive thinking before it really gets…

Police Convert Antifa Into Productive Members Of Society By Playing Jordan Peterson Clips On Giant Video Screen PORTLAND, OR—Riot police in Portland have introduced a new strategy for countering Antifa: playing Jordan Peterson clips on…

U.S.—Democrats have stood firm on their core values for many decades, from being for diversity and racial justice and killing as many babies as possible. But they're finally changing their tune after unborn babies started wielding knives in…

Every time something bad happens, we start thinking, "What was the real motivation here? Was this just a terrible tragedy, or was it really... ... WHITE SUPREMACY?" The answer of course, is almost always white supremacy, but we still have…

WORLD—According to sources, Cain has killed his brother Abel to become the first murderer. In his defense, he claims white supremacy is actually to blame. "You can't really hold me responsible for this, God," Cain said to The Almighty. "I…