Ultra-Spiritual Christian Reminds Followers That God’s Kingdom Never Has A Government Shutdown

VENICE BEACH, CA—Local ultra-spiritual Christian Bryan Hanover reminded his followers Thursday that God’s kingdom never has a government shutdown.

“I see everyone fretting about the government shutdown—but what about the only government that matters: the Kingdom of God?” he wrote in an incredibly profound Facebook post. “He never has a budgetary issue or a funding crisis. I bet all you worldly Christians never thought about that.”

Hanover is often able to take normal things and find what he calls “the God factor” in them, calling his followers to think about how spiritual he is through his Facebook and Twitter posts. “See, what I do is I look at something that’s really popular, and I find a spiritual angle,” he said. “While everyone else is playing checkers, I’m over here playing 4D spiritual chess, as I find the God angle in everything.”

The man quickly capitalized on his observation, emailing over twenty-three Christian publishers to see if any would be interested in publishing his forthcoming book on the topic.

At publishing time, he hadn’t heard back, though he attributed the lack of interest to the concept being “way ahead of its time.”