Image Of Jack Skellington With Particularly Wicked Smile Suggests T-Shirt Wearer Not Your Typical Disney Fan

HASTINGS, NY—Pointing to the alarming picture as a sign that something was unmistakably amiss, sources confirmed Thursday that an image of Jack Skellington with a particularly wicked smile suggested that a local T-shirt wearer was not your typical Disney fan. “It’s clear from looking at the face of the Nightmare Before Christmas protagonist with his teeth bared and his eyes glaring that the man wearing this shirt has tastes that tend towards the dark and disturbing,” said observer Taryn Greene, noting that the presence of the Tim Burton character in the throes of ghoulish delight left little doubt that if the man wearing it took a trip to Disneyland, he would completely ignore the bright and upbeat attractions in favor of The Haunted Mansion or Snow White’s Scary Adventures rides. “It wouldn’t surprise me at all to learn that this deviant individual’s home is overrun with posters and merchandise celebrating the likes of Ursula, Captain Hook, and some of the other most reprehensible villains in the Disney canon.” At press time, Greene was reportedly chilled to her very bones after the man put on a baseball cap emblazoned with the words “Twilight Zone Tower Of Terror.”

The Onion