Jesus' Coming Back

Feminism Win! This Sex Doll has a mouth

In a man’s world, it can be hard to find a win :(. But this #feminist just got a little cheerier because see this doll right here? This silicone woman-shaped 46-14-36 vessel for Dick Dannon? Well this sex doll has a mouth!

“Not every sex doll has a mouth but yeah, some do,” said Geoff Cork, who describes himself as a sex doll expert, art history PhD, and above all else, redditor. “Some are just select body parts or portions, depending on what kind of romancin’ you’re doing and how deep your pockets are.”

But in a move that totally shatters the glass ceiling, this one does have a mouth! It has lips and a big enough opening to get some words through, assuming it has vocal chords and an intact Broca’s area. Which means the creator clearly thought that this woman should be allowed to and even encouraged to speak! “In art, the mouth is portrayed as a vessel for thoughts and feelings. Some critics call it a portal to the POV,” said Cork, eyes still glued on his episode of Rick & Morty.

According to the manufacturer’s class action hotline, adding a mouth was an intentional move in order to “lift up women and support feminism and you know, all that shit,” said customer service agent John F. “We really wanted to show people that women are more than just vaginas and urethras and anuses and belly buttons and ear holes and, yeah in some cases, stomas.”

Um hello Nellie McClung, RBG, and Naomi Wolf? Wake up from your cryogenic chambers because your dreams have been realized!

When women are encouraged to speak, we get to say what’s on our minds. And when men, largely the creators and consumers of sex dolls, support that by making and buying sex dolls with mouths, it’s just about the greatest thing a lady could ask for, right? I mean, what’s next? Selling sex dolls with experiences and perspectives and leg hair?

“I doubt any of these clam clones will get the American Girl doll treatment, but maybe,” said Cork. “Grab me a Gatorade and I’ll start explaining.”

Beaverton

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