Jesus' Coming Back

Manitoba Premier Brian Pallister announces he will embarrass province for another two years

WINNIPEG – Manitoba Premier announced his action plan to humiliate the province for the next two years before he resigns in 2023.

The premier made the announcement immediately following his statement on how the term “genocide” isn’t that big of a deal, which was immediately followed by a joke about cruxifying atheists.

“I know I have put our province on the map,” said Pallister, wearing a t-shirt declaring “No Fat Chicks in MB”. “It has been a pleasure to serve Manitobans and I will continue to serve them for another two excruciating years until my replacement is found to take up my legacy.

“I have so many more thoughtless statements and ornery inaction when it comes Indigenous people, COVID-19, and minorities, I couldn’t possibly resign right now.”

Upon retirement, Pallister plans to spend more time bodyguarding the remaining statues of Sir John A Macdonald.

Beaverton

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