White Dolls From American Girl Now Come With Fun Book Saying How Terrible They Are

MIDDLETON, WI—Announcing their new arrivals of dolls for little girls to play with, American Girl™ unveiled a special new feature that comes with every white doll: A fun book describing how terrible they are. 

“Hi friend, I’m Joss™. I love animals, going on adventures, being born into the oppressive white race that embraces systemic oppression to maintain its grip on all institutional power structures, and playing dress-up,” reads the first page of the book that ships with this season’s most popular American Girl™ Doll, Joss™.

The book includes pages of fun facts that will feed the imaginations of young girls. Below are just a few facts that really make Joss™ come to life:

• Her best friend Makena™ is black, therefore a pawn in Joss’s™ scheme to not appear as racist as she really is.
• Her dad owns a restaurant, and works hard every day to overwork and underpay minorities of all races.
• Her favorite dress—sold separately—looks strikingly similar to that of slave-owning Scarlet in Gone With The Wind.
• She prefers Chick-fil-A™ to Popeye’s™.

American Girl™ will soon unveil a line of Asian American dolls, which will come with books explaining why Asians are white-adjacent and therefore part of the problem.

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