Canada’s Parliament resumed yesterday, and Erin O’Toole has announced that multiple Conservative MPs received medical exemptions to the requirement that everyone be vaccinated to enter the House. Although it is statistically unlikely that, in a group of 119 people, so many have received valid medical exemptions, we thought we’d put together a top ten list of the very valid reasons these Tories could not get the vaccine.
1. Allergies (specifically to criticism from Rebel Media)
2. Chronic fatigue caused by listening to Pierre Poilievre speak
3. Misunderstandingthecharterofrightsandfreedoms-itis
4. Advanced facebook exposure
5. Already got COVID because they refused the vaccine the first time around
6. Terminal ‘I did my own research’ tumour
7. Inability to stop screaming about Myocarditis whenever someone asks them why they don’t just get the vaccine
8. Constantly quoting Atlas Shrugged syndrome
9. Syphilis
10. A specific form of Tourette’s where they constantly shout ‘fuck your grandma’
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