U.S.—Scientists have warned of a new, rapidly spreading phenomenon known as “Musk Derangement Syndrome.” Those working at Big Tech companies and liberals in favor of censorship seem to be the most susceptible to being infected, according to experts.
Some scientists theorize the virus causing the syndrome mutated from Trump Derangement Syndrome earlier this year, raising concerns that it could cause many of the same destructive symptoms, from nonsensical rambling and cognitive dissonance to choosing to bankrupt your company rather than sell it to Elon Musk and screaming at the sky.
“Fascinating,” said one researcher as she observed the virus under a microscope. “It seems this virus rapidly mutates, causing the host to have an uncontrollable and inexplicable hatred for Elon Musk. It doesn’t matter if they have never actually read up on who Musk is or what he’s done. They just foam at the mouth and break small objects upon hearing his name.” According to the researcher, the hatred for Musk occurs regardless of whether the host approves of other billionaires owning large media outlets or trusts billionaire-owned newspapers like The Washington Post. Most concerning is the virus can cause outbursts of violence, though scientists say this shouldn’t be cause for alarm as most people infected with the virus have “like, no upper body strength.”
Scientists are also warning that if left unchecked, MDS may mutate into EWDWMDS, which stands for “Everyone Who Disagrees With Me Derangement Syndrome.”
Mandy is absolutely triggered by Twitter’s possible takeover by Elon Musk. She attends a Twitter-sponsored therapy session to help her cope.
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