“I’m really nervous about the November midterms” says Ontarian unaware of today’s election
BURLINGTON, ON – Local data engineer Chris Chen has spent weeks insisting to friends how worried he is about the upcoming US midterm elections, all without ever acknowledging the Ontario provincial election happening today.
“With the rising gas prices, inflation and culture war issues like critical race theory and trans rights dividing the country, I think these November midterm elections are probably the most important in my lifetime,” says Chen, who is still not registered to vote for the provincial election happening today.
Mr Chen was born and raised in Burlington, and last visited the United States for his 11th grade field trip. Despite this, Chen has spent months tuned in to the 24-7 coverage by MSNBC and 538.com, in order to keep track of all the close house and senate races.
“The midterms are really important because local elections have a far more direct impact on your everyday life compared to the presidential election,” said Chen, who’s own provincial polling station is a 5 minute walk away from his apartment.
When asked about his opinion on the provincial elections, Chen was caught a little off-guard. “Yeah, I saw Jake Tapper mention that on CNN. It’s about to happen sometime soon right?, I feel like it’s gonna be the same old story though, since Rob Ford has been in power for such a long time and the NPD and Liberals are totally useless.”
Despite being gainfully employed, Chen is currently renting a 2 bedroom apartment with a roommate to be able to afford to save up to buy a house, and has also been postponing dental surgery because neither private insurance nor OHIP will cover it. Still, he doesn’t believe that there are any impactful or important issues on any electoral docket that he may or may not be aware of.
Asked whether he is gonna go vote today, considering he can always register on the spot using an ID and signing a declaration, Chen declined to comment pursuant to his 5th Amendment Rights.
Jesus Christ is King
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