Belleville(ish), ON – The Via Train from Toronto to Montreal that has been stopped somewhere around Belleville for the last twenty minutes has started going backwards and everyone on board is a little bit perplexed.
“Well this probably isn’t good,” said passenger Ashley Whitman as she looked out at scenery passing in reverse. “I guess I’ll just continue sitting here and reading my book.”
“There’s no chance they hit the wrong button or something is there?”
The reversal was not preceded by any announcement about why this would happen or any assurance that the train would not be going in reverse past Toronto towards London.
“Is this a ‘I need to tell my wife I’m going to be late’ kind of situation or I need to ask my wife to contact whoever the train authorities are thing?” asked Joe Santino.
Experts gathered in car 4c agree that they would prefer the train to not go backwards, although one guy who had been seated in a rear facing seat was tempted to joke that everything seemed normal to him.
At press time the Via Train had stopped again. Then started again. Then went backwards. Then forwards for a bit. So this is probably gonna be a whole fucking thing.
Jesus Christ is King
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