CEOs Explain Why They Oppose A 4-Day Workweek

“My employees are beautiful, and every second that I spend not looking at them is absolute agony.”

“I wouldn’t want to strain my employees by making them cram all 80 hours of the workweek into four days.”

“Studies show people with two days off tend to just get drunk and watch TV, but people with three days off tend to organize nationwide militant wildcat strikes.”

“If I only have enough work for one day, why should I be forced to work for three more?”

“Was all for it until I found out they expected to leave the factory at some point in those four days.”

“Shorter workweeks won’t bring my wife back.”

“Having more burnt-out, mentally ill people is better for business.”

“But that’s one less day people are forced to hang out with me.”

“Our employees are more than welcome to take time off from their second or third jobs.”

“God forbid our harvesters have the free time to get swept up as child soldiers.”

“I can understand needing time off because I have a family, but then what do all my workers need time off for?”

“Friday’s our busiest day for catastrophic oil spills.” ​

“That means the weekend gets longer and I have to spend more time with the kids when it’s my turn per the custody agreement.”

“If employees only come in Monday through Thursday, when exactly is casual Friday supposed to happen?”

“I’m good with a four-day workweek if the next workweek starts when the four days are up.”

“That would make the weekend like, what, 20 days? That’s way too much time off.”

“Breaking employees’ spirits requires them to work a minimum of five days each week.”

“What if the fifth day is your birthday? I don’t want you missing out on the office party. Come into work just in case.”