High School Teaches Co-Parenting Skills By Having Students Fight Over Who Gets Egg For Weekend

CALUMET, OK—In an effort to prepare the teenagers for the reality of rearing children, students at Calumet High School were reportedly learning co-parenting skills Tuesday by fighting over who got to take their egg home for the weekend. “While not a perfect simulation, this project gives students a taste of what it’s like to threaten and undermine one another,” said family and consumer science teacher Jenna Tunnel, who stated that she had paired off her ninth grade students by lack of compatibility and given each group one raw egg to attempt to scream at each other over. “There are always some students who complain that the assignment is too taxing, but the majority appreciate learning what it’s like to send and receive incredibly cutting text messages about their carelessness and suspected problem with alcohol. Leaving a voicemail saying you’re going to take their ass to court if they’re even a minute late to handoff is an invaluable skill they will all someday need to use in the real world.” At press time, Tunnel added that students would automatically fail the assignment if a judge awarded full custody to their project partner.

The Onion