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Golden State Warriors Present Kamala Harris With Blank Jersey

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WASHINGTON—Honoring the vice president during their visit to the White House, the NBA champion Golden State Warriors presented Kamala Harris Tuesday with a blank jersey, according to sources in attendance at the ceremony. “Oh yeah, I almost forgot—I’m supposed to give this to Camilla?” said Warriors rookie shooting guard Ryan Rollins, pulling out a numberless, wadded-up jersey that an aide took and gave to Harris as star players Stephen Curry and Draymond Green chatted with President Biden. “Yeah, that’s for you, I guess. It’s been worn a few times, but you’re welcome to it. Maybe if you have a favorite player, you can write his number on there. It’s up to you, really. We don’t have a signed game ball for you, but we would like to present you with this Dick’s Sporting Goods gift card, which you can use at any location to purchase a regular basketball.” At press time, reports confirmed Harris had worn the wrinkled jersey around the West Wing for the rest of the day but no one commented on it or appeared even to notice.

The Onion

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