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Yoko Ono Booked To Yodel At Next Year’s WEF Summit

DAVOS — The World Economic Forum has announced a follow-up to this year’s smash musical hit, booking Yoko Ono to yodel for three straight hours.

“I don’t know how you top this year’s performance, but a yodeling marathon might just be the ticket,” said organizer Klaus Schwab. “I for one can’t wait to hear Ms. Ono, presuming we’re not all dead from climate change.”

Though ostensibly a meeting about global warming, the World Economic Forum surprised attendees with one of the most dynamic musical performances in a generation. “I don’t even know what happened, I think I blacked out,” said former Vice President Al Gore. “She was making some sort of bird noise mixed with the sound of screeching tires, and gosh – the beauty just overwhelmed me. This is why I do what I do.”

In addition to yodeling, Mr. Schwab is hoping to add an all-cricket concession stand for next year’s concert. “Did you know you can brew beer with crickets?” asked Mr. Schwab, showing off his glass. “Well you can’t, but you can pour a bunch of booze into a jar of crickets and call it beer. You down a jug of that and chow on come cricket chips while listening to Yoko Ono – you’re in for one heck of a night!”

At publishing time, Mr. Schwab announced that next year’s $20,000 conference fee would include tickets to Ms. Ono’s concert as well as one free “Hail Hydra” bumper sticker.


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