Everything Jair Bolsonaro Has Done While In Exile In Orlando

The Orlando film classic is well known as Bolsonaro’s all-time favorite movie.

When he heard he could see top city attractions all on one digital pass, the fiscal conservative simply could not pass up the opportunity.

Ever since being pecked by an Emu-like bird during his own Covid isolation, Bolsonaro has become a bit of a bird magnet, often experiencing multiple bird bites in a single day.

They don’t have them in Brazil.

With no Amazon rainforest to devastate, this was his only other option.

After a night of carousing at Señor Frog’s, an inebriated Bolsonaro insisted his driver pull over at a nearby tattoo parlor so he could get a ring of stylized thorns inked around his bicep.

That boy can put away beans!

Even military officers aren’t immune to the power of acrobatic dance.

He also has a few referral codes left if you act fast.

When his wife wasn’t looking, Bolsonaro misfired at the wax museum thinking he was actually hitting on the pop star.

Like so many Disney World tourists before him,​ Bolsonaro lifted his shirt just as his picture was taken at the end of the flume ride.

An Orlando rite of passage.

A stunned Bolsonaro just assumed Donald Trump’s residence was located inside Disney World, and not a two-and-a-half-hour drive away.

No heavily armed military presence? Minimal security cameras? My God. It’s practically begging to be occupied…

It’s actually even scarier the second time!

Bolsonaro got to have the quintessential American experience of panicking after getting an absurdly high hospital bill.

In his obsessive quest to collect every strain of the virus, Bolsonaro attended two indoor sports events and five campus parties at UCF before finally getting BQ.1.1 at a local preschool’s winter recital.