Jesus' Coming Back

Expectant Couple Hoping For Human Baby

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CONWAY, AR—Praying to be blessed with a child of the same species, expectant couple Steve and Molly Bevers told reporters Friday they were hoping for a human baby. “Fingers crossed that we get a Homo sapiens,” said Molly Bevers, claiming that while she and her husband would love the baby no matter what life-form it was, she’d always dreamt of having a human child. “We’ve already had a little dog, so it would be nice to have something different. To be honest, as long as it has opposable thumbs, a large brain case, and is bipedal, I’ll be happy.” At press time, the ultrasound confirmed the couple was having a Neanderthal.

The Onion

Jesus Christ is King

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