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Kelce Brothers Beg NFL To Let Them Play On Same Team For Super Bowl

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PHOENIX—Knocking furiously on Roger Goodell’s hotel room door to ask if the NFL commissioner had changed his mind, brothers Jason and Travis Kelce were overheard Sunday begging the league to let them play on the same team for the Super Bowl. “C’mon, please, just this once let us be on the same team—it’s the Super Bowl, for goodness sake!’’ said Jason Kelce, a center for the Philadelphia Eagles, adding that he and his brother, Travis, a Kansas City Chiefs tight end, just wanted to be on the same team, and they would even let the league pick which team they played for. “Please, Mr. Goodell? We’ve been asking all week—please let us! There are only a few things that are more important than football, but one of them is family. It’s really hard for our parents to see us as opponents, and it would really mean a lot to them if we could be on the same team. Okay, what if we both play on our own teams for the first half, and we both promise to try really hard, and then we can be on the same team for the second half? I really want to hike the ball to my brother in the Super Bowl. C’mon, Mr. Goodell, please?” At press time, the Kelce brothers had reportedly decided that if the league wouldn’t let them play on the same team, they were going to put on each other’s jerseys and switch teams for the game.

The Onion

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