Conservatives Explain Why They Oppose Drag Shows

“I oppose any type of community that could give my gay son the love and support that I refuse to ever give him.”

“I just think no one will ever be able to do it as well as Divine.”

“If men start wearing dresses, next thing you know, women will be wearing them too.”

“Half my guys left to try out for the varsity drag team.”

“I went to a show once and it was incredible. She had a voice like an angel. Sounded exactly like Whitney Houston. When I found out afterward that she had been lip-syncing, I felt completely betrayed.”

“I don’t like it when men wear clothes.”

“My life is miserable, colorless, gray, and every reminder that other people are out there enjoying themselves is like a dagger through my heart.”

“’Material Girl’ isn’t even that good of a song.”

“I’m just against self-expression in general.”

“Drag shows make me feel like I’m not pretty, and when I feel ugly I get mad, and when I get mad I hurt people. Better just to avoid it entirely.”

“Drag queens are always showing these things called ‘books’ to my children and are clearly grooming them to read.”

“If I can’t serve cunt, nobody can.”

“Drag shows are sexual in nature, and children shouldn’t be exposed to anything sexual except movies, television shows, advertising, and the internet.”

“Death is terrifying and it’s easier to fixate on this than think about how I’ll disappear someday.”

“There aren’t really any statistics or information out there suggesting this is a problem, but I just have a gut feeling that some facts exist supporting my hatred of drag brunches.”

“I’m sick of people stopping me on the street and asking if I was on Drag Race.”

“My father died serving looks.”

“The more popular they get, the more people are asking for homes with sizable performance spaces.”

“They laughed off my idea for a big red lady named Marilyn Ketchup.”

“I have even bigger hair than most of them and my tips are half as good. What gives?”

“The community’s toxic.”