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Nostalgic Woman Hopes ‘Barbie’ Movie Lives Up To Girlhood Body Dysmorphia

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SPRINGFIELD, MA—Noting that the upcoming film would have a high bar to clear, local woman Reese Gillespie told reporters Monday she hoped Barbie would live up to her girlhood body dysmorphia. “I can’t wait for the Barbie movie to finally come out—growing up, those dolls were always my favorite source of negative body image issues,” said Gillespie, who added that she was “thrilled” the studio had selected female writer–director Greta Gerwig to helm the project, given there was no way a man would ever be able to do justice to the toy that was at the root of her eating disorder. “I have so many childhood memories of playing with Barbie and agonizing over my flawed appearance. It looks pretty promising from the trailers so far. I mean, come on, Margot Robbie? She’s perfect. I’ll definitely feel like shit after staring at her for two hours.” At press time, all of Gillespie’s body image issues had resurfaced after watching Oppenheimer.

The Onion

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