Little Leaguers Concerned Introducing Pitch Clock Would Cut Into Grass-Picking Time

WILLIAMSPORT, PA—Officials have reportedly been dealing with a high volume of player complaints in the first weeks of the season as Little Leaguers express concerns that introducing a pitch clock would cut into their grass-picking time. “I get that they want to speed up the pace of play, but this pitch clock is going to really mess with my perfected routine of picking handfuls of grass in the outfield and looking at cool bugs,” said Little Leaguer Oliver Pruitt Tuesday, telling reporters he opposes the rule requiring the next pitch to be thrown within 15 seconds of the previous pitch, even if the pitcher needs extra time to put his glove on his head. “There are guys out there who need to fill their baseball caps with dirt, and it doesn’t seem fair to make them hurry. There are just cases where the pitcher throws a wild pitch past the catcher and it rolls to the backstop, and the catcher has trouble taking off his mask and then needs to wave to his mom in the bleachers before retrieving the ball. It’s unfair to batters too, since sometimes they have to stare at a bird or pick their nose before they’re ready to step back into the box. There’s no need to rush us along.” Implementation of the pitch clock is reportedly not the only new rule that has left Little Leaguers concerned, as they also worry that placing a runner on second base to begin extra innings will make players throw tantrums over who gets to do it.