Jesus' Coming Back

Quiz: Who should you vote for in the Alberta Provincial Election

It’s election day in ! And if you are a resident of the Wildrose Province you may be wondering: who should I cast my ballot for? Well take this fun and then you will be in a binding contract to do what the results tell you to.

1. How do you feel about ?
They were a vital, temporary tool in the fight against COVID
They are worse than anything the Nazis did. Also get ready ‘cuz I’m going to bring up the Nazis a lot in subsequent answers.
I didn’t like them but I didn’t hate them. They’re basically the Bee Gees of public measures.
2. How should the Alberta government address climate change?
By taking any action necessary that doesn’t involve stopping the export of the substance that is the cause of climate change.
With prayer. And . And gun prayers.
3. Should taxes be raised on the wealthy to pay for increased social services?
Taxes should be raised on the social services to pay the wealthy.
Yes but 10-20% less than what the other person who said yes thinks.
4. Should Danielle Smith’s previous comments about the and those who took them disqualify her from office?
Only if you think that deluded psychopaths make for bad Premiers.
What about Rachel Notley’s controversial position of intentionally starting the wildfires to make Smith look bad?
But if we disqualified people for doing terrible things before they ran for office we wouldn’t have our greatest PM Justin Trudeau.
5. Does the word socialism scare you?
Not as long as the word democratic is in front of it.
I literally have nightmares where I come home and find socialism in bed with my wife.
Words are meaningless. Like what does ‘election reform’ even mean?
6. The most important quality I look for in candidate is…
Having a fiscal plan that will enhance quality of life for poor and marginalized communities
Someone I can get a beer with and talk about how the Nazis actually invented the in 1943.
7. What do you think the most important issue facing Alberta is?
How do we maintain our economic growth in an increasingly post-fossil fuel world?
How do we maintain our economic growth in a world where the globalists at the WEF are out to get us?
How do we maintain our economic growth in a world where Justin Trudeau is no longer PM?
8. Should Alberta separate from Canada?
Of course not. But maybe Edmonton and Calgary should separate from the rest of Alberta.
Only if the rest of the country doesn’t meet our 58 point list of demands.
No. But maybe if we threaten to a certain someone will come for a big Unity rally?

Quiz: Who should you vote for in the Alberta Provincial Election
You should vote for the NDP!
You care about the little guy. You don’t want to spend your days reading about endless culture war bullshit. You have heard at least a minute of Danielle Smith talking and understood the implications. Fortunately the NDP and Rachel Notley are here for you. And if things break your way you could be looking at a second NDP government Albertans would immediately blame for every single problem in the known universe.
Quiz: Who should you vote for in the Alberta Provincial Election
You should vote for the !
You think Danielle Smith is on the right track. So what if she shoots from the hip and doesn’t mince words. At least you know she’s honest and not a career politician. And when the next clip of her saying some kooky shit comes out you’ll just chuckle and say ‘that’s my Premier.’ Also you literally don’t care about anything except sticking it to the big city elites and their commie NDP allies.
Quiz: Who should you vote for in the Alberta Provincial Election
You should vote for the Alberta Liberal Party
Yes it technically exists. We don’t know who leads them and they won’t win a single seat but your commitment to centrism and supporting the federal makes them the perfect party for you. Also based on your answers you might actually be Justin Trudeau? if so could we have some of that you gave all the other newspapers?
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