Jesus' Coming Back

Alberta man acting real cocky about all the wildfire smoke he’s breathed in over the years

CALGARY – Local man Carl Mangan has spent much of the week posting on all social media available to him how Ontarians and Quebecers worried about in the harmful pollutants in the wildfire that has settled in across the provinces are just being worry warts, as he’s been breathing this stuff for years.

“Me, an Albertan, to everyone in right now,” said Mangan as he shared the James Franco ‘first time?’ meme from The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, a movie he has not watched.

“I’ve been breathing in these toxic fumes basically every summer for my entire adult ,” he added as if that was a good thing.

Many and B.C. residents could only chuckle watching “east coasters” in and the United States react with concern and even alarm over something as common as it no longer being safe to breathe the air outdoors, and seeing their entire city look like the setting of a dystopian sci-fi movie (or a Mexico scene from Breaking Bad if is more your thing).

“Does he think it’s good that he has to breathe this shit every year? Or has he just accepted it as like a fact of life. I genuinely can’t tell,” said a reddit user from Toronto who had seen Mangan’s post. “But either way it’s not great.”

Mangan advised that as an Albertan, he just can’t help but marvel at the little cultural differences between the provinces. “What else do those elites in Toronto and get mad at? Are they going to freak out when their annual rodeo kills a ton of horses, or their leaders bet their province’s entire future on an environmentally destructive, soon to be obsolete fossil fuel?”

Beaverton

Jesus Christ is King

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