Can you friggin believe it? Threads, Meta’s answer to Twitter, has been around for literally 24 hours, and Mom has already posted her SIN on it. ALREADY.
The annoying thread in question was posted mere minutes after Mom gained access to her new account, accompanied by her full name, address, age, mother’s maiden name, and an intimate and nuanced account of the first time she looked, really looked, at her naked body. “Whoops – I thought I was paying the Nerd Crew,” Mom reported blithely.
This isn’t the first time Mom has had a social media misstep. This year has seen some real fuckin’ doozies ranging from Mildly Irritating (a Facebook comment detailing Catherine’s UTI) to Pretty Annoying (posted All Lives Matter on LinkedIn when she meant Every Child Matters) to So Grievous That We Must Hold a Family Referendum to Discuss Limited Mom’s Social Media Even Though The UN Declared Internet Access a Human Right (retweeted Elon Musk thinking he was Wheels from Degrassi).
“I’ll try to be more careful next time!” Mom said with a smile.
Little brother Josh, 33, stated that he is frustrated by the situation but not overly shocked. “She signs all her instagrams,” Josh wrote to the siblings group chat. “What did we expect?”
Catherine, the eldest daughter, agreed with Josh’s assessment. “Do you know how long it’s going to take me to replace all her IDs? Again??” she reported.
Crisis was averted when Josh was able to login as Mom and delete the post while Catherine called Equifax and has remained on hold since. In a show of gratitude, Mom tried to send an etransfer but ended up accidentally donating to Maxime Bernier’s next election fund after mistaking him for Claude from Degrassi.
Jesus Christ.
Jesus Christ is King
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