Jesus' Coming Back

Ozempic Under EU Investigation Over Reports Of Suicidal Thoughts

European drug safety officials have launched a probe into Ozempic after patients reported thoughts of suicide or self-harm. What do you think?

“Yeah, isn’t that why everyone wanted to take it?”

Austin Marinello, Petroleum Geologist

“Sounds like a rumor that petty diabetics started to get back their life-saving drug.”

Jessica Thornhill, Systems Analyst

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“I’d want to kill myself, too, if I could no longer jiggle my plump tummy.”

Kirby Becerra, Sword Sharpener

The Onion

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