New ‘Mission Impossible’ Features Tom Cruise Attempting To Get Bag Of Chips Off High Shelf

U.S. — Now in its seventh installment, the newest Mission Impossible will see Tom Cruise face his most daunting task yet: retrieving a bag of Lay’s potato chips from a moderately high shelf.

“This was the most insane thing Tom has ever attempted,” said director Christopher McQuarrie. “Buckle up, America.”

Tom Cruise has famously performed his own stunts throughout his career, and Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning was no exception. “There are no stepstools, no one giving Tom a boost,” said stunt coordinator Mason McCormick. “Tom just went for the chips — he is an absolute adrenaline junkie. It made that hanging-on-to-the-airplane stunt look like child’s play.”

Mr. Cruise has excitedly touted the film as the most exciting chapter in the franchise. “I think we’ve put the ‘Impossible’ back in Mission Impossible,” said Cruise. “We pushed the boundaries of believability on-screen. Honestly, there were times I didn’t think we would even be able to complete the movie. Those chips were on a really, really high shelf.”

At publishing time, the studio had announced that Mission Impossible 8 would follow Tom attempting to make Scientology sound intelligent.

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