Jesus' Coming Back

Amazed Woman Sees Face Of Jesus On Crucifix

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TOLEDO, OH—Marveling that the Son of God had appeared to her in the most surprising of places, local woman Florence Stahl said she was amazed Monday when she saw what looked to be the face of Jesus Christ on a crucifix. “It’s a miracle, the image of our Our Lord and Savior has appeared before me on a wooden cross,” said Stahl, who added that she couldn’t believe her eyes when she first looked at the religious symbol and noticed the divine manifestation of none other than the redeemer staring right back at her. “I see His eyes. His beard. His crown of thorns. A divine miracle has occurred. What else could explain His image appearing right above my altar? Praise the Lord!” At press time, the Catholic Church had certified the crucifix as a miracle and had acquired it for display in Vatican City.

The Onion

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