There you are, sitting across from an elderly, demented man drooling on his oatmeal, when suddenly you begin to wonder: Am I in a nursing home, or in the chambers of the United States Senate?? To help you solve the mystery, look for these nine helpful differences:
1.
Nursing Home: Residents call out “Bingo!” to win money
Senate: Residents call out “Aye!” to spend your money
2.
Nursing Home: Costs $10,000 per resident per month
Senate: Costs $10 billion per resident per second
3.
Nursing Home: Residents alert a nurse when they’ve soiled themselves
Senate: Residents wave to camera as if nothing happened when they’ve soiled themselves
4.
Nursing Home: Surprisingly, plagued by STDs
Senate: Not surprisingly, plagued by STDs
5.
Nursing Home: Aides tell residents which domino to play
Senate: Aides tell residents which country to invade
6.
Nursing Home: Pudding and smoothies in the cafeteria at 4
Senate: Pudding, adrenochrome, and roasted flies in the cafeteria at 4
7.
Nursing Home: Smells of death and fecal matter
Senate: Same, if the President stops by
8.
Nursing Home: A bunch of old, angry people yelling about missing Matlock
Senate: A bunch of old, angry people yelling about missing Matlock
9.
Nursing Home: Residents all still alive
Senate: Residents were all, at some point, alive
It takes a keen eye to spot the differences – let us know any that we missed!
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Babylon Bee
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