Jesus' Coming Back

Toronto man who moved to Ottawa feeling right at home after seeing how shit their transit system is

– Born and raised man Kyle Chilton was nervous about moving to Ottawa when his job relocated, but says he is starting to feel at home after getting a good look at the broken down, unreliable system known as .

“There are a lot of things about Toronto I miss: grabbing a Beef Patty at the Bathurst stop, riding the escalator up to the Scotiabank Movie Theatre, getting high and then freaking out when I see the OCAD building,” said Chilton. “But moving here and being forced to rely on a poorly managed, inefficient transit system just to get from A to B really made me feel welcome.”

“Honestly it feels like I’ve brought a little bit of Toronto with me every time I read that the is down and officials don’t know when it will be back.”

Despite living in Ottawa less than a month Chilton has already gotten to experience nearly as many transit delays, busses being out of order and complete system failures as he did in his last year of living in Toronto.

“All OC Transpo needs to complete the comparison is an automated voice asking a random series of numbers to please call control and to build an entire subway line along a street that nobody uses,” added Chilton.

However some long-time Ottawa residents are concerned about the similarities between OC Transpo and the , noting this could just be the beginning of Ottawa importing other things Toronto has, like fun, nightlife and activities that don’t involve skating on a big frozen river.

Beaverton

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