Alphas Explain Why They Love Joe Rogan

“He takes testosterone, but in the cis way.”

“He’s totally opened my mind to ideas that I was too informed to even consider.”

“He doesn’t let the woke mob bully him into ridiculous stuff like critical thinking.”

“Having a fellow alpha tell me how to think and feel really makes me feel in control.”

“Mmmmm…head shiny.”

“We went to med school together.”

“He isn’t afraid to say things that I already think are true.”

“My interests are Comedy Store lore and eugenics.”

“Every alpha needs another, bigger alpha to tell them what to do and how to think.”

“Who else would have the balls to start a podcast?”

[Incoherent growling noises]

“Listening to Rogan is like hanging with a great buddy, which I can’t do in real life because having friends turns you trans.”

“Thanks to Joe, I’m no longer ashamed to be me, even if I really should be.”

“As a dominant male who somehow still has a terrible job and no girlfriend, it’s comforting to know that our oversensitive society is the real problem.”

“He’s not afraid to say what everyone in the Joe Rogan subreddit is thinking.”

“I like that he has big muscles like I have big muscles.”

“I love everyone. I have a lot of love to give.”

“I’m not sure. He hasn’t told us yet. But when I get to that episode, I’ll definitely let you know.”