Jesus' Coming Back

China Bans Seafood From Japan As Treated Radioactive Fukushima Water Release Begins

Japan has begun releasing treated radioactive water from the wrecked Fukushima nuclear power plant into the Pacific Ocean, a process expected to take 30 years to complete, prompting China to immediately ban all seafood from the country. What do you think?

“But the radioactivity adds such a nice umami undertone.”

Zoe LaForge, Computer Assistant

“Meanwhile, I’ll eat anything to keep our trade relationship alive.”

Tim Gianelli, Systems Analyst

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“I’d ban anything from the Earth’s surface just to be safe.”

Webster Burke, Receipt Collector

The Onion

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