SAN FRANCISCO—Advertising a large selection of ripped, stained clothes that were all over 15 years old, a new Stitch Fix subscription service introduced this week sends customers the same ancient, dumpy T-shirt that their wives hate. “With Stitch Fix’s new line for schlubs, our style experts will send customers old shirts their partners swore they threw out years ago,” said Stitch Fix CEO Matt Baer, adding that users would be sent a box each month that included several pieces of clothing from college and their early 20s that they had worn until the garments had essentially disintegrated. “In this latest collection, all shirts will be too tight, have visible sweat and food stains down the front, and feature several holes in the armpits. Your wife may have tried to make you look presentable, but we will make sure you look like the same old slob she married all those years ago.” Stitch Fix later announced another new service that sends women their old clothes from high school so they can see if they still fit and cry when they don’t.
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