Disillusioned Journalist Begrudgingly Adds Taylor Swift Reference To Article About Libya Flood

NEW YORK—In an effort to increase traffic and engagement by inserting mentions of the famous singer, disillusioned journalist Marcus Pruitt begrudgingly added a Taylor Swift reference to an article about the flood in Libya. “The death toll of the tragic flooding that swept through northeastern Libya currently numbers over 11,000, or about one-fifth of the attendance of the average Taylor Swift concert,” wrote the dead-eyed Pruitt before including a line about how the water brought in by Storm Daniel had caused pain and suffering on a level not seen since the Ticketmaster debacle. “While the extent of the economic damage is yet to be fully understood, foreign aid that could otherwise have gone to buying tickets to T. Swift has been pouring into the flood-ravaged nation. Sadly, many of these Libyan families are never getting back together, much like Taylor and Harry Styles. If you would like to go deeper, here’s a link to a timeline of Taylor Swift’s relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal.” Pruitt numbly added that Taylor Swift’s body has not yet been identified among the dead.