Jesus' Coming Back

8 Ways To Spot A Christian Kid In Public School

Brought to you by: Focus on the Family

Public schools are a lot different today than they were years ago. In the old days, Christian kids could blend right in with the crowd at public schools. Today? Not so much. God-fearing, Bible-believing kids tend to stick out like sore thumbs at school these days.

How easy is it to spot them? The Babylon Bee is here with a list of dead giveaways.

  1. They do this weird thing where they close their eyes and fold their hands before eating lunch: Suspicious!
  2. They have zero holes in their face, their hair isn’t rainbow colored, and you can confidently tell their gender: Total Jesus freak.
  3. They point to the sky after booting a home run in kickball: We see you, Timmy!
  4. They ask the band director if they can play the hand bell: That one’s a freebie.
  5. Uses bigoted phrases like “Yes, ma’am” and “Yes, sir”: The nerve of these Christian kids!
  6. Always wearing a “Kirk Cameron Rulz” T-shirt: Guaranteed to believe Jesus rules.
  7. Politely asks if they can learn about math instead of gender theory: That’s got Christian written all over it.
  8. Parent-teacher conference has to be called because they keep baptizing other students in the school pool: A big clue!

There you have it. If you notice any kids at your school fitting the description of the items listed above, you’ll know you’re really with one of those Jesus Freaks!


NOT SATIRE: Empower your faith and make a bold statement this Bring Your Bible to School Day! On the first Thursday of October, students across the nation come together to celebrate their right to express their beliefs in a powerful way. Unite with fellow believers and share the joy of knowing Christ in your classrooms and hallways.

Discover the magic of the Bible’s timeless wisdom and let its words guide your conversations, ignite your imagination, and inspire you towards a path of knowledge and compassion.

Together, let’s illuminate our schools with the radiance of the Bible’s teachings. Don’t forget — mark your calendar and bring your Bible to school!

This is your day to shine. Share the Word. Inspire the World. #BringYourBible


Kyle Mann was just minding his own business, when- BOOP! A wild Gender Fairy appeared!


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Babylon Bee

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