Brought to you by: The Goldwater Institute
While government officials usually do an excellent job making decisions for your family, even they can make mistakes! Here are eight signs that it’s time to change schools from what the government chose for your kid:
- Your 12th-grader is still failing shapes and colors: Really becomes an issue when they start driving.
- The school uniform is a furry suit with ears and a tail: Concerning.
- The government insists the school is fine and no change is necessary: Huge red flag!
- They don’t teach about the Roman Empire in history class: Get your sons out of there, NOW.
- The tetherball court on the playground is just a pole where they tie a white kid to a string and smack them: Not an ideal environment for a youngster.
- The homecoming queen is also the running back: Time to leave, kiddos.
- They suspended your child for screaming “MAGA!!!” over and over again during study hall: Darn liberals.
- The school has a soccer team: RED ALERT!
If you need more advice, feel free to schedule an appointment with the government-approved, gender-fluid, rainbow-haired counselor. They’ll know what’s best for your kid!
NOT SATIRE: Ted Cruz, on behalf of the Goldwater Institute:
“I spoke with Victor Riches, the President of Goldwater Institute, and I told him I would help them raise $50,000 in their fight against radicals in education. I am asking all of my supporters to donate right away.”
Please donate $10, $35, $250, or any amount you can generously contribute>>
The Goldwater Institute is a trailblazer in advocating for school choice and parental rights. Goldwater Institute not only fights for school choice in the legislature, but they also protect school choice victories in the courts. Through their efforts, Arizona was the first state to offer a universal school choice program and give all families access to the educational options most suitable to them. The Goldwater Institute’s exemplary school choice legislation set a precedent for the rest of the nation. They have assisted Iowa, Michigan, Utah, and West Virginia in implementing their own school choice programs, and they have no intention of stopping until school choice is a nationwide reality.
Please send an urgent donation today to continue school choice success across the nation >>
I am personally asking you to donate any amount you can to the Goldwater Institute and help me raise $50,000 for them. They are on the frontlines in many of the battles conservatives desperately need to win. Please send your support today!
~Ted Cruz on behalf of the Goldwater Institute
Kyle Mann was just minding his own business, when- BOOP! A wild Gender Fairy appeared!
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