OLYMPIA, WA—Noting that it would be the perfect opportunity to practice shading, color, and light, local courtroom artist Allen Jansen told reporters Wednesday that he hoped his next defendant was a bowl of fruit. “I’ll be honest, the figure work is great and all, but I’d give anything for the bailiff to escort a giant bowl filled with apples, oranges, bananas, and grapes to the stand right now,” said Jansen, adding that the light in the courtroom could not have been more perfect for the defendant’s table to hold a beautiful arrangement of fresh produce laid perfectly atop an intricate lace tablecloth. “Looking at my sketchbook from today, I’ve got four guys who have been accused of various crimes, plus their lawyers. Boring. Oh, man, I really hope the next judge who walks in will be several lemons and a blue vase full of yellow flowers. A guy can dream.” At press time, Jansen told reporters that in order to keep his courtroom drawings interesting, he was just going to ask all the defendants to pose nude.
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