Jesus' Coming Back

Cyber Monday Sales Expected To Hit Record High

According to a new survey from Deloitte, shoppers plan to spend an average of $567 between Black Friday and Cyber Monday this year, with 40% reporting that they’re hitting the sales to try to get around rising prices. What do you think?

“As long as CVS is open Christmas Eve, I’m set.”

Julius Felker, Dictionary Auditor

“Awesome, I’ve been waiting all year to buy food.”

Mona Davila, Windowsill Botanist

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“It’s sad we need a holiday to celebrate mindless consumerism.” 

Mitchell Schlosser, Systems Analyst

 

The Onion

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