LOS ANGELES—Following an indictment on nine federal tax-related charges, Hunter Biden reportedly prepared for court Friday by drawing a tie on his bare chest. “I’ll have to look presentable if I want the judge to take me seriously,” said the troubled son of President Joe Biden, straining to look down at his exposed chest as he tried to mark the outline of a tie, and then coloring it in with a black marker. “I want to come across as respectful of the legal process, so I’m also going to scribble on some dress socks and paint a nice pair of Oxfords on my feet. Shoot, I wish my dad were here to help me straighten out the lines like he did when I was younger. I better draw a phone on my hand so I can call and tell him how sorry I am about all this.” At press time, Biden was seen in the courthouse restroom hurriedly erasing some cocaine he had drawn on his nostril.
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