Elon Musk Announces He’s Recruiting Volunteers For Dangerous One-Way Mission In Self-Driving Cybertruck

AUSTIN, TX—Providing consumers with the opportunity to die a hero, Tesla CEO Elon Musk announced Tuesday that he was recruiting volunteers for a dangerous one-way mission in a self-driving Cybertruck. “We are looking for brave souls willing to embark upon a harrowing mission from which they will never return,” said Musk, explaining that while those who signed up to go to the grocery store in the autonomous vehicle might not survive, they would be forever memorialized in the annals of history for their service. “I’m not going to sugarcoat it. There are extreme dangers associated with the Cybertuck, and there’s no telling what could go wrong. But in our effort to collect data on what it takes to survive a trip around the block in a Tesla-made product, we have to be prepared for the worst.” At press time, the Cybertruck had reportedly exploded on the driveway before taking off.