Fake hockey fan able to enjoy his team signing good players without conducting armchair salary cap analysis
TORONTO – After his team signed one of their best players to a long term contract extension, casual fan Matt Christenson celebrated without even performing his own detailed analysis of how this will affect their Salary Cap position going forward.
“I get to watch more of a player being very good at hockey for my hockey team? Sweet!” said Christenson, who had not even put in the minimal effort required to study how this contract compares to contracts signed by comparable players, in terms of total value, AAV and Salary Cap percentage.
“Remember when he scored that massive playoff goal for us? I hope he does that again this year,” he added without any notable concern for how this contract may force the team to bridge the contract of their good rookie players rather than locking them up long term.
Christenson, who watches every game and cheers passionately for the team when he attends in person, is one of many ‘not real’ fans who follow their team for the hockey and not the statistical analysis of a budget for an organization they don’t work for.
“Matt and I grew up die hard fans together. So it’s tough seeing him drift away from the game/economic projection we both love. I mean he doesn’t even have the CapFriendly site bookmarked for christ sakes,” said friend Eric Collins.
Christenson seemed blissfully unaware of how odd his behaviour seemed to real fans, announcing that he thinks the team “has a real shot now” instead of dwelling on the player getting slightly more money than analysts had predicted, which he does not have to pay himself.
In related news Christenson was confusing friends and family further by celebrating when his favourite player scored a goal even though he didn’t have him on his fantasy team.
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