Jesus' Coming Back

Scientists Find Clues About Why More Northern European Descendants Get MS

Findings from a project comparing modern DNA with samples from ancient human teeth and bones allowed scientists to find disease-linked genes following prehistoric migrations, tracing a path back to the Bronze Age Yamnaya people who probably carried the genetic mutation to protect the nomadic herders from infections carried by their livestock. What do you think?

“Damn. I really wanted to blame my mother’s poor prenatal diet.”

Gavin Perkins, Papal Understudy

“Are we positive ancient people weren’t designing viruses in labs?”

Kara Courtwright, Systems Analyst

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“Haven’t Northern Europeans suffered enough?”

Rodney Rabenbauer, Freelance Trucker

The Onion

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