Jesus' Coming Back

Millions Watch Emmys For Rare Glimpse At TV Actors

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LOS ANGELES—With the hopes of learning more about the reclusive and oft-unseen individuals, 3.1 million viewers reportedly watched the 75th Emmy Awards to catch a rare glimpse of TV actors. “What’s fascinating is that you get this peek at these deeply private people who emerge to be seen in public for just one night every year,” said Emmys viewer Sam Kilgannon, echoing many viewers who tuned into the award ceremony for the chance to get some of their first-ever peeks at people like Jeremy Allen White, Issa Rae, Jon Hamm, Ali Wong, and Jimmy Kimmel. “These people are essentially hermits. They shrink from attention, and I get that. In fact, that’s why it’s such an incredible service they’re providing to show up at the ceremony and get a few photos taken so we can remember them before they recede back from the limelight. There’s also literally no way of knowing whether or not Selena Gomez is dating someone unless she shows up on the red carpet with a plus-one. So that’s important, too.” Kilgannon added that an especially nice touch was that the television actors showed up to the Emmys in beautiful dresses and impeccably tailored tuxedos despite their famous aversion to drawing attention to their looks.

The Onion

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