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Climate Protesters Terrified After Mona Lisa Extends Big Tongue And Starts Licking Up Soup

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PARIS—Backing away slowly in fear at the unanticipated response to their public demonstration, climate protesters reportedly grew visibly terrified Monday as the Mona Lisa extended a big, wet tongue and started licking up the soup. “Yum, yum, yum, me happy for soup,” said the iconic Renaissance masterpiece, springing into life before the screaming activists as a 1.5-foot-long tongue emerged from its open mouth and began to lap up any remaining trace of the Campbell’s soup they had splattered upon the canvas. “Mmm, still warm. Thank you. You nice to Mona Lisa. It tomato? Tasty in my belly!” At press time, the Mona Lisa had reportedly caused the climate protesters to flee in confusion as the portrait offered to lick their faces clean in case there was any soup there, too.

The Onion

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