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Daycare Boasts Great Screen-To-Toddler Ratio

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GALLATIN, TN—Touting its access to Cocomelon, Noggin, Disney+, and other popular video services, local daycare Little Angels Learning Center boasted Monday that it maintained a great screen-to-toddler ratio across all its programs. “We’re proud to say that every child enrolled in our daycare receives individual one-on-one time with a dedicated iPad,” said the center’s owner, Jane Zielen, who lamented the fact that many under-resourced childcare facilities had only one screen for as many as 30 children. “And it’s not just videos. Our tablet computers are equipped with dozens of apps aimed at helping 2- and 3-year-olds develop the real-world skills of tapping, swiping, and endlessly scrolling, which together form the foundation of strong habits they will carry with them into adulthood. Without the hands-on experience of playing Bubble Popper on an iPhone, kids risk falling dangerously behind their peers in their ability to stare dead-eyed at the bright colors flashing on screens.” At press time, the daycare center was honored to receive accreditation from the prestigious National Association for the Media Consumption of Young Children.

The Onion

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