ST. LOUIS—In an effort to introduce a more satisfying version of their calcium tablets, Tums debuted a new deep-dish antacid pizza Friday that offers eight piping-hot slices of digestion aid. “Tums Antacid Deep-Dish Pizza features a two-inch-thick authentic Chicago-style crust of calcium carbonate topped with loads of caramelized sodium polyphosphate, then smothered with a stewed and chunky talc,” read the press release in part, detailing how the extra-strength heartburn relief aid was slowly baked to perfection in a large cake pan, then slid into a 700-degree pizza oven until it started bubbling. “Buy it fresh from one of our new Signature Tums Kitchens or find it in your local freezer section for a convenient take-and-bake option. One slice is filling enough to cure any sour stomach, working much faster than any tavern-style antacids on the market. Best served piping hot and washed down with a cold beer for ooey, gooey instant relief.” The company confirmed that one slice of Tums Deep-Dish Antacid Pizza contains 750 calories.
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