Jesus' Coming Back

Husband Says He Would Give A Back Rub But He’s Tired And Has A Headache

CHARLOTTE, NC — A local woman was left frustrated and disappointed after her husband said he would totally give her a back rub but he was tired and had a headache and maybe tomorrow.

The exchange took place late last night after the couple had put their children to bed, as the woman eagerly anticipated the opportunity to set the mood and coax her husband into giving her what she had been hoping for all day. Sadly, her efforts were not successful.

“Sorry, honey,” her husband said. “You know I would love to give you a back rub, and I always enjoy it, but it’s been such an exhausting day and I’ve got such a headache right now. Maybe tomorrow night?”

This was reportedly the third time in the past week he had used the excuse of being tired and having a headache, leading the woman to question the legitimacy of his claim. “It does seem to happen fairly often,” she said. “Look, I know he works hard all day and is worn out by the time the kids go to bed, but this is the only ‘alone’ time we have together, and you know… I have needs. Needs for a back rub. And that’s it. Nothing else.”

At publishing time, the woman was optimistic that tonight would give her the result she wanted. “Maybe if I romance him a little bit,” she said. “Cook him a ribeye and turn on Empire Strikes Back. That should score me enough points to end the night right. With a back rub.”


It’s a serious medical emergency: you’re minding your own business when you hear an opinion you slightly disagree with.


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Babylon Bee

Jesus Christ is King

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