HOLLYWOOD – At a recent red carpet interview, Dune: Part Two director and French-Canadian apologized to the province of Quebec for not including a cameo by beloved mascot of the Quebec Winter Carnaval, Bonhomme Carnaval in the film.
“I want to represent my home province more in my work,” Villeneuve said while trying to photoshop a ceinture fléchée on a picture of Dave Bautista. “But when it came to the logistics of putting a man made of snow in the middle of the desert, test audiences were saying it was just too unbelievable.”
“People were saying also that Dune takes place 20,000 years in the future and there wouldn’t even be evidence of Bonhomme’s existence then,” Villeneuve continued. “But they are fools. Bonhomme is immortal with no end and no beginning. He exists in all of us and none of us. He is space, he is time. His eyes absorb the light and souls. So yeah, I think he’d blend in just fine, dumbasses.”
Sources say in the original draft, Bonhomme comes to Paul Altreides (Timothee Chalamet) in a moment of weakness, and gives him the spirit to continue seeking revenge by waving and dancing to fiddle music then offering him a half-chicken meal from St-Hubert.
“Yeah, I had no idea what that was all about,” Timothee Chalamet stated while doing a little dance that made him look like an 11 year-old who just discovered rap music. “Also can you tell Denis to stop wearing berets around me and asking if I even go to the boulangerie every morning? It’s not a ‘who’s more French’ competition.”
French-Canadian fans were hoping to see some kind of reference to Quebec in Dune: Part Two as Villeneuve always tries to slip one in. Long-time followers of his work will remember in Blade Runner 2049 when Celine Dion played an escaped replicant, or the scene in Arrival that included famous children’s character Fanfreluche that was almost cut because producers said she was scaring people more than the aliens.
Villeneuve will have to wait until January 2025 to receive his punishment at the Quebec Winter Carnaval where Bonhomme will give him 40 lashes on top of a float, and he will have to stuff himself with tire sur la neige (maple taffy) until he gets giardia.
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