MONTREAL, QC – It was a typical Friday night for Kenneth McPherson as he called a 2 A.M. Uber Share on Montreal’s nightlife-ridden St. Lawrence street. Little did he know, 3 blocks away, on Avenue du Parc, Travis Henley was grabbing the exact same Uber, aptly driven by 45-year-old part-time substitute teacher Stu Hedding. Three Males, Two words: Boys Trip.
Kenneth, saving a dollar seventy-five with Uber Share, opened the door of Stu’s pine-scented Corolla. After a few seconds of carpool discomfort, everyone settled in. They studied one another for a moment and it suddenly hit them – “Boys Trip!” they shouted in choir-like synchronicity.
“Giddy-up.” exclaimed Stu, shifting the gear into D, as AC/DC began to play, and the three men started a once-in-a-lifetime 2.1 kilometer journey of male bonding.
In less than a minute, the group had somehow acquired cigars, and the piney odor morphed into forest fire. “I hope this night never ends!” shouted Stu, revving the engine of a car you should not do that to. Estimated arrival to Travis’s apartment – Six Minutes.
“It ended as quickly as it started,” remembers Travis, now happily engaged and no longer living a life of impromptu adventure. “I still speak to Kenneth from time to time. We meet up for a beer here and there to talk about life. No word from Stu, though. Last I heard he moved to the Yukon to work on a gold mine. Crazy bastard.”
We were unable to contact Stu, but his stepmom confirms he has indeed relocated to the Yukon.
“I just remember having the time of my life.” explains Kenneth, who looks back on the 15 minute voyage with much fondness, but admits it was too short. “One second we’re taking bong hits out of the sunroof and the next, that responsible female Uber voice takes over the car speaker and demands us to ‘Drop off Travis.’ And it was over, just like that. Girls ruin everything.”
Jesus Christ is King
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