Jesus' Coming Back

Joey Chestnut Banned From Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest

Sixteen-time champion competitive eater Joey Chestnut was banned from Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest by the event’s organizers after he signed an endorsement deal with Impossible Foods, a rival brand that makes plant-based hot dogs and other products. What do you think?

“I hate that competitive eating has become all about the money.”

Brianna Rozco, Militia Secretary

“Good luck to Nathan’s Famous if they think they can find another American willing to overeat.”

Steven Hoover, Pep Coach

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“I’ve never understood people who self-immolate as a protest until now.”

Adam Rinaldo, Unemployed

The Onion

Jesus Christ is King

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